I can go for a jog, I can swim, but the problem is: I have no spontaneous breathing! I have to take every breath consciously. And if I am not diagnosed and treated, I will die!
It started when I broke my rib in 2011, but got worse and worse. It must be a very rare disease, for I have found no info on it! My lack of breath gives me only 2-3 hours of sleep at night, and this lack of sleep ruins my ability to work.
What`s worse: The severe sleep deprivation caused by close to zero sponteneous breathing also makes me continously anxious so I have to use zopiclone pills to handle my anxiety! It has gotten so bad I sometimes feel like I`m loosing my mind, and I dare therefore not travel by airplane, move to another city, and can hardly even get out of my home - until my condition is treated! If only I had support from my parents, family, and local doctors, but they treat me as a mental-patient.
Why would I, an IQ of 123 (had better before) , author of 9 books, a Reichian Scientist (www.tensororgonite.com) suffer and lie for 7 years? All the symptoms are there: The lack of sleep due to close to zero spontaneous breathing gives me anxiety which the doctor gives me pills for! But why will they not diagnose me? Why would I, a hard working, social citizen lie and stay in bed - never leaving home because of anxiety??? I who used to travel, freedive, meet girls, visit pubs, and work in politics???
That is why I fear I am a targeted individual or ¨TI¨, in lack of better terms. Because the shear apathy and gullible disbelief surrounding my obvious condition.
Most tend to say: ¨But you are breathing now¨. Yes, but I have to breathe consciously, it`s no automatic thing...!!!
My mother says: ¨Well you`re still alive!¨ And that`s all the help they gave me for 7 years.
And the doctors say: ¨Your x-ray, inhaling and exhaling is normal.¨
To that I can only say: ¨But I have no spontaneous breathing.¨
Others say it`s a psychosomatic disorder, that is, my lack of spontaneous breath is stress-realted, in other words: Partially mental and partially physical!
Because they are the only ones out there with the same symptoms as I!
I DON`T CARE BECAUSE I AM DYING FROM LACK OF BREATH EVERY NIGHT!
I also have what they call mild dysphagia, but it has lately gotten much worse. In general, if I do not receive a full lung-transplant, I will die.
The least they could do is to take me to a sleep-clinic to analyse my sleeping patterns! But no such thing has been done, and my parents seem not to care!
Are they in on it too???
The problem is it`s gotten so bad I can barely leave home due to anxiety! And there`s only one bed, my home bed that I feel comfy enough to sleep in!